Not doing ministry causes me to struggle with me. I define myself by it, and yes, in an unhealthy way. That is not to say that ministry isn’t a beautiful, great, meaningful part of my life. My lack of participation has been more the result of my health, than something of choice.
When you fall out of a routine, any routine, it is easy to forget what was so great about it. When I don’t get to see kids, ministry loses meaning. I hadn’t gotten to spend time with either leaders or kids for a couple of weeks, until yesterday. My heart was instantly reminded why I am called to this.
Here are some stories to illustrate.
At Moore Middle School yesterday I just got to walk around and see all of the kids who I have developed relationships this year. It was great to know that I was missed. Kids came up to me, “SEAN! I haven’t seen you in forever!” Kids love better than me most of the time. Sunday night a middle school student and his dad came to watch Flu and I play soccer. I got to help a girl named Nicole do her math homework. And best of all, there is a girl named Carolina who we always beg to play soccer with us and she never will. It is amazing to me, especially considering how good she is. Yesterday I begged her to play, and since her friend wasn’t there, she did.
The best part of my week, without a doubt, was playing soccer with Carolina. It would have been enough just to see her schooling all the boys, like she normally does, but there was more. Flu and I did everything we could to get her a goal. It was fun passing back and forth with Flu to distract everyone and then giving the wide open ball to Carolina. She hit the post about four times, and things weren’t looking good. We had about 5 minutes left to play and Flu and I told her to stand in front of the goal. We would feed her to ball, she would shoot, it wouldn’t go in, Flu and I would go retrieve the ball, and it would start all over again. Finally, she rocketed a shot into the goal with her left foot. Flu and I freaked out in celebration. Then Flu announced last goal wins, we got her the ball and she yet again put it in the net. Flu and I ended up on the ground, making screaming noises in celebration while Carolina giggled. Probably one of the best moments of my life.
Sometimes we get lost in the forest. Moments like these are my bread crumbs, so that I don’t forget where I came from. And while most would use bread crumbs to get them back home, I use them to remember why I set out in the first place.
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